18.Foolish Games

            Chapter 18

It was Chris who had suggested it, on a long weekend at the end of the summer that they spent in Paris together. Chris had bought the trip to make up and thank Joni for giving up a chance to go to Paris to model that summer, choosing to spend time with him instead.

After a fabulous dinner at an expensive restaurant, and a walk along the streets of the beautiful city, they arrived back at their hotel room.

“Thank you for the dinner, Chris, and for all of this…. This is… well, you really surprised me,” Joni smiled at him, watching as he took a bottle of sparkling wine and opened it.

Chris grinned.

“So you’re not regretting your choice?” He asked raising his brow and pouring some wine into two glasses. Joni, who now stood before the window smiled softly and finally, shook his head.

“Other chances will arise, I’m sure.”

Nodding Chris approached him, giving the other glass to him.

“When I go to the army…” Joni started looking into Chris’ eyes with a hint of sadness; they had talked about it before and what it would mean; that most likely they wouldn’t be able to see each other for anything between 6 and 12 months and Joni thought it would be best to then be sensible enough to break up and stay friends, it would be crazy to ask the other to wait for that long.

Chris brought his finger to Joni’s lips before he could continue.

“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about…” He smiled, “come… let’s sit on the couch,” taking Joni’s hand Chris led the teen to the near by sofa, seating him down.

Joni looked up curiously, Chris had seemed… anxious the whole time, almost excited but refusing to tell him what he was planning.

“So yes, you have been right; there is a surprise I’ve been dying to tell you…” He started, sitting down next to him “what better place than here?”

“Okay… now you’re making me nervous…” Joni chuckled when Chris took his hand in his and smiled mysteriously, silently, just watching him.

“Just spit it out Chris, don’t tease me,” Joni laughed, “just please don’t ask me to marry you,” he joked nervously.

At this Chris laughed,

“I’m not asking you to marry me, I’m asking you to move in with me,” he finally told him.

“O-oh…” Joni felt surprised, “but Chris… I… we talked about this… I’m… as much as I like Canada; I’m not ready to move there and….”

Smiling Chris shook his head and brought his hand on Joni’s cheek,

“No, love… The thing is, I’ve been offered and have accepted a job in Helsinki… I’m moving in October and I want you to live with me… I love you; I don’t want to give you up, not for some stupid army.”

For a moment Joni wasn’t able to speak, lost for words, it came as such a big surprise, it was more than he had been ready for, so much at once; Chris saying ‘I love you’ for the first time, Chris saying ‘I’m moving to Helsinki’,Chris asking him to move in with him. Different emotions went through him at once; confusion, fear, happiness, excitement, nervousness, even slight nausea that might have been dizziness, then panic and again happiness… moving in… love…Chris’ words repeated themselves over and over in his head, love … it was such a big word, it was such a big step… Paris, the hotel, the dinner, gifts… all of it… love…Chris loved him…Chris was doing this all for him? Giving all up… for him?

“Well, aren’t you going to say anything?” Chris asked carefully, making Joni realise that he had been quiet for quite long, his mouth felt dry.

“I-I’m surprised….” Joni sighed, “w-why didn’t you say anything? I mean… when? How?” He frowned.

“Wanted to surprise you…” Chris answered tilting his head, “I thought you’d be happy.”

“Oh I am… I am!” Joni assured quickly, “I’m just surprised…”

 “I talked with your uncle… he has connections and remember that day when you had that modelling gig in Helsinki? Well I had a job interview then…”

“Two weeks ago?” Joni still felt stunned,

“Yes and furthermore they were able to arrange an apartment for us…” Chris smiled, “it’s all arranged and ready, all you have to do is say yes…” Chris whispered leaning closer to brush his lips against his, “please say yes…” he murmured against his skin, putting both of their glasses down,

“But is the right time? What will you do all those weeks when I’m away? I don’t want you to regret your decision, this is a big change.”

Chris frowned, “Of course I know that,” he was getting slightly annoyed and upset, “I can survive the week days, knowing I’ll see you on most weekends, knowing it’s temporary… Would you rather break up? For us to move forward we have to take this step or simply give up. I want to be with you and I thought you wanted the same.”

Sighing Joni reached to touch Chris,

“I’m sorry…. of course I do,” he whispered and leaned to kiss him, “I was just, I didn’t expect this and I’m surprised… you know? But… it doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t want to move in with you.” He smiled then, “so just wipe that frown off your face,” he teased grinning, his finger caressing Chris’ brows.

Chris wrapped his arms around him and pushed him down on the couch

“Good, for a while there you got me worried…” He smiled and leaned to kiss him. “I just hated the idea of breaking up with you … and … I like it in your country…I’m not close with my family, so I thought why not? You’re important to me.”

Joni brought his hand on Chris’ cheek,

“I didn’t want to break up either….”  He smiled, “…though I am happy, next time promise me that you’ll tell me beforehand about big decisions like this, alright? That we’ll make them together.”

“Of course Joni, of course…” Chris assured and once more brought his lips on his.

**^^**^^**^^**

Leaving the home in which you grew up felt odd. Joni was packing his things together wondering what to leave and what to take with him, they had gotten new furniture with Chris and his father said he wanted to leave his room for him the way it was for when they would come visit, at least it made things easier.

Sighing he looked at all the boxes around him, looking around in the room; it was really true, leaving home, really starting adulthood, moving in with Chris… He had thought before that he would be doing this alone, imagined his life somewhat different and part of him wondered what it did for his plans to travel, for his dreams of spending months in another country working… He bit his lip, part of him panicky; was this what he really wanted? Could he still stay and change his mind? Chris had a career while he wasn’t sure what he would end up doing after the army besides modelling….

Would Chris later want to travel with him? Could he? Why was he having these sudden doubts and fears?  He should relax, not think too far ahead, things would work out and he liked Chris, he loved him… there should be no problem, should there?

Chris would arrive in two weeks, he would have time to settle in first in their new home and… it would be wonderful, all of it!

And there he sat, on the floor, in front of all his boxes trying to get rid of sudden cold feet.

 “Do you need any help?” Joni almost jumped hearing Katja’s voice from the doorway. He looked up at her and smiled slightly.

“I don’t know,” he said honestly, “I guess I can manage, I just have trouble deciding what to leave behind.”

Katja smiled gently, walked closer and sat on his bed,

“Joni, you’re not moving that far away, you don’t have to know everything you want to take with you now,” she reminded him watching him carefully.

“Heh, yeah, you’re right,” Joni rolled his eyes at himself and sighed.

“Are you excited?” Katja asked then.

“Hm, yeah,” Joni nodded looking up again smiling, “it’s a nice apartment, big and yeah,” he nodded slowly, continuing to fold his clothes into the boxes.

“A little nervous too perhaps?” Katja guessed.

“A little,” Joni admitted, “it’s normal I guess?”

“Yes,” Katja smiled tilting her head while looking at her stepson; it had come as a slight surprise to her when Joni had told them about Chris finding a job there and them moving in together, while remembering Joni’s earlier talks of going to Paris or London after the army.

“You know…” She started carefully, hesitated, “well…have you thought about what you’re going to do when you finish army?” She decided to ask.

Joni again glanced at her,

“I’m not sure… “ he admitted, “perhaps I could finish high school,” he shrugged, “I have time to think about it.”

“It’s a good idea, to finish school.” She nodded, “and what about travelling?”  She decided to ask.

“I guess we can book some trip after I get out of the army, we’ve talked about it… “

Katja nodded, but couldn’t help but think how young Joni was, couldn’t help but worry that their moving in was too hasted, of course they had dated for almost a year, but during that time they hadn’t been able to meet so often and so there might be surprises for both of them. Chris was older and in a different situation in life than Joni and… Chris was Joni’s first really serious relationship; she worried.

“Just remember, you should never give up on your dreams, not for anyone… You’re young, I don’t want you to regret that later.” She said softly.

Joni glanced at her, part of him tempted to tell her of his sudden panic, but chose not to, instead he smiled.

“I’m happy and I’m not giving up on my dreams, don’t worry, they should be reachable even while being in a relationship.” He said wanting to believe that.

“Good,” Katja got up, smiled and ruffled his hair, “just remember that you’re always welcome here, you can always come back to us even if it’s the middle of the night; this will always be your home.”

“Thank you,” Joni said looking up, smiling; it felt somehow reassuring to hear.

**^^**^^**^^**

Their first months were enough to settle Joni’s mind that it had been the right choice, they were happy, arranging their home trying to get Chris more familiar with the culture and surroundings of his new home before Joni would go to the army leaving Chris to get by on his own the weekdays and some weekends.

The good thing was that Chris got along well with Joni’s family and Joni could be certain that his father would assist him if needed and surely when Chris would get more familiar with his co-workers he would make friends to keep him company. Though Chris was often with him when he visited his friends it didn’t look like Chris would feel comfortable with spending time with them without him and though Dima and Linda often visited, it seemed like Chris and Dima didn’t really click enough to be friends, they seemed to have little to say to each other and Joni wasn’t sure if it was for Chris reluctance or Dima’s. When he left the room and they were alone for awhile, the conversation was awkward or even lacking completely….

And then in January Joni had to go and he could clearly see how much Chris would have wanted him to stay, but at the same time he himself couldn’t help but think that small separation might do some good for them both, keeping the relationship fresh. Joni noticed he missed more alone-time while Chris seemed to be happy to spend all the free time they had together.

Joni made new friends quickly during his service time; one of them was Markus, same age as he was, gay and in a relationship as well. Markus was a funny, laid back guy who made Joni’s army time a lot more tolerable since his modelling background had come to be common knowledge and caused some superiors to single him out for it, testing him almost.

Chris and him were doing fine, though Chris often said how much he counted the days to when Joni would be back home for good. He complained about being bored or lonely after work, apparently not making friends as fast as Joni had thought he would. And when Chris learned of his new formed friendship with Markus it seemed to make the man sour; jealous, it hadn’t helped when Joni had told him that Markus was quite happily living with his own boyfriend and though yes, they were both gay, there was no romantic interest between them. In this regards Joni had forced a little lie, the truth was they did flirt, Markus’ sense of humour was that way and Joni saw no real harm in innocent flirting and teasing; if it didn’t go farther than that, it was slowly coming quite clear though that in this Chris’ and his opinions were different.

But Joni wanted to make him feel at ease and thought it had been a good idea to accept an invitation from Markus to come and have dinner with them, the evening however didn’t go as well as he would have liked….

Chris had been whining the whole day about having to go there, he had seen Markus briefly a few times when picking Joni up from the train station and he didn’t like the guy; too friendly… gay; a threat. Joni was getting tired, finally threatening to go alone if Chris wouldn’t change his attitude and that was enough for him to try and pull it together.

“Remember to behave or it will be cold nights on the couch for you,” Joni warned him when they arrived in front of the apartment, before ringing the door bell.

“Fine,” he groaned glaring at Joni, “I’m sure I won’t have fun though. I don’t see what you like about that guy.”

“I really am warning you Chris,” Joni sighed shaking his head.

Markus opened the door with a huge grin on his face,

“Come in come in,” he invited, “welcome to our humble home, really humble.” He smiled, Chris rolled his eyes in secret and took his shoes off while Joni handed the guy a bottle of wine.

“Don’t worry, it’s not like we live in a mansion,” Joni grinned and watched as Lauri cautiously approached them.

“Hi,” the boy chirped and though Lauri was older than Joni and Markus, 22, he looked younger, being a short and kind of skinny brunet with big innocent looking blue eyes.

“You must be Lauri, nice to meet you,” Joni shook his hand smiling politely, the boy… young man, Joni reminded, glared at him and muttered his greeting, almost seeming intimidated. ”And this is Chris my boyfriend,” he introduced and kind of lazily Chris reached to shake Lauri’s hand.

“Charmed…” He muttered earning another glare from Joni.

Lauri was perhaps just as thrilled as Chris was, of course he had known that Joni would be handsome, having heard from his boyfriend that he was a model but now when seeing him he was even more handsome that he had thought, tall, slender and pretty; probably head filled with air… He wanted to believe that Joni would prove to be rather silly and brainless, he didn’t like how much Markus had been raving about him.

He then glanced at the Canadian; handsome and tall as well, fucking unfair that everyone was always taller than him. He just hoped that Chris would keep his boyfriend from hitting on his.

“So are you hungry?” He asked trying to be polite, “the table is set.” He smiled.

“Yeah come on guys, let’s eat, I’m starved!” Markus grinned, then glanced at Chris, “So you’re a computer gay, I mean guy, weren’t you?” He asked and then laughed at his own word mix up.

Chris counted to ten silently following Joni; keeping an eye on his every move, every smile and every word.

“Yes, computer guy and gay.” He answered as calmly as possible.

“So games and all that shit?” Markus asked stopping in front of the table gesturing them to sit down.

“Yep.” Chris nodded feeling bored already, he sat down rearranging his fork and knife and napkin.  Joni sat down next to him and sighed to himself; he had hoped for more of an effort from Chris.

“So, Lauri, what was it that you studied?” He asked hoping to get a more relaxed atmosphere in the room.

“I study to become a nurse… now I’m doing civil service at a rest home,” He explained glancing at his boyfriend who for some reason was snickering to himself while serving the food to them.

Joni tried to keep himself from grinning and just turned it into a hopefully polite smile,

“Oh yes, Markus did mention something like that,” he nodded, glancing at his friend,

“Did I?” Markus grinned, remembering that he had called his boyfriend a nanny the first time the subject had come up.

Chris cleared his throat glaring at Markus.

 “And what do you do?”

“Oh just army for now, then probably go back to my work at the warehouse.” Markus answered, setting the portions of chicken and rice into each plate, “wine or beer? You look like a beer man Chris,” he teased.

“Wine with the food, thank you.” Chris answered not wanting to give Markus any satisfaction of being right.

“Sure, Joni?”

“Wine will do,” he nodded.

“So, civil service? Political view?” Chris asked from Lauri, once Markus had also sat in front of the table.

“I don’t like guns,” Lauri answered, slicing up his chicken, “or violent, senseless wars where innocent people are being killed. The world would be a better place without guns.”

Markus glanced at him,

“Well it is fine idea dear, but you know it’s not possible. We need to have an army to defend ourselves.” He sighed then looked at Chris and Joni, “this is the one subject we highly disagree on.”

“I think it could be possible,” Lauri muttered.

“And yet it’s not, not unless by some miracle all nation suddenly have some happy pills to stop all evil thoughts, or suddenly everybody abandons religion, face it Lauri; not everyone thinks like you.” He said looking at him closely, Lauri started pouting, “Not everyone are so sweet natured I mean… Let’s not start this again; we have company.” He reminded.

An awkward silence followed,

“Hm, this chicken tastes delicious,” Joni smiled then,

“Lauri cooked it, I’d be happy to eat his food more often.” He said hoping to cheer up the mood.

“Not looking forwards to that forest camp,” he added then laughing.

“Oh me neither, God I’m so tired of that model shit, tired of the Mr Finland comments; I mean come on, I’m in better shape than half of the limp dicks there and it pisses me off how they’re all on my case; have you noticed? Especially that Sergeant Koivu, fucking dickhead..”

Markus laughed,

“I think he has a crush on you… annoys him to have such a pretty gay boy there threatening his peace of mind, having a hard-on using his superiority on you, oooh, fantasising…” He grinned,

“Ew! Don’t want to think of that! Thanks a lot Markus,” Joni shook his head chuckling.

“Imagine him there masturbating his little, thin, hairy dick inside his sleeping bag thinking of you and…”

“Stop! Seriously,” Joni took a sip of his wine, “I’m about to lose my appetite here,”

“Sorry, couldn’t help it.”

“Is he harassing Joni?” Chris asked, “who is this guy?” His eyes instantly narrowed, “why didn’t you tell me?”

“Relax Chris, Markus is just teasing. He is just some fucking prick with too much piss in his head. I’ve complained about him before to you. He’s just the kind of man who needs someone to pick on and this time it happened to be me.” Joni sighed, “but it’s nothing that I couldn’t handle, I kind of expected something like this and it could be worse.”

“Yeah nothing to worry about Chris, Joni is a big boy,” Markus grinned getting a beer for himself.

“Anyway, how have you liked Finland so far Chris? I understand you haven’t lived here that long yet.” He asked then sitting down.

Chris played with his glass.

“Almost 6 months already,” He answered, then glanced at Joni, “it’s been okay, but I can’t wait to have Joni back home permanently.” He smiled and Joni smiled back at him softly,

“I know it feels long now, but I’m sure that the time goes by faster than you think.” He nodded, touching his hand under the table.

The evening continued, more drinking, Joni and Markus were on a cheerful mood talking and raising their glasses getting drunker by the minute until they both came up with the idea of wanting to go clubbing to celebrate their short couple of days of freedom.

Lauri and Chris, both being more sober and slightly annoyed by the close friendship that the two seemed to have, reluctantly gave in, knowing that otherwise they would go without them.

As soon as they arrived at the club Joni and Markus went to get drinks and when back at the table they would at times forget to talk in English which annoyed Chris even more. They were too close, Joni was flirting… Markus seemed to be hitting on him, looking at him in that certain way, not even paying much attention to his boyfriend, and with each passing moment Chris disliked the guy even more. The final straw was when the two went dancing together; Chris was steaming.

Finally Chris was able to persuade Joni to leave for home with him, though he had been reluctant.

“I don’t get why we had to leave so early, I was having fun,” Joni pouted in the taxi.

“’Cause I’m pissed at him for groping you!” Chris glared at him, Joni rolled his eyes and waved his hand.

“We were just dancing, god give it a rest…” He said and when the taxi stopped in front of their building Joni got up; since Chris had forced him to leave early he could pay for the bloody cab.

Chris hurried to pay the driver and got out quickly following Joni,

“Oh it didn’t look like dancing, it looked like snogging.” Chris gripped his elbow and dragged him to their apartment.

Once in the hall Joni pulled his arm free,

“You’re delusional! He snapped, “we were just dancing, alright?”

“Dancing, just dancing? Then why are you defending yourself so much?” Chris threw his jacket away and looked at him angrily.

“What the hell, defending myself? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Joni asked annoyed, undressing his coat and putting it away.

“Oh don’t pretend you don’t know what I mean!” Chris shouted following Joni into the kitchen, “You stick to each other like fucking lovebirds!”

“Oh come on!” Joni narrowed his eyes, “lovebirds in my ass!” He snapped, “You know, whatever, I don’t have to listen to this crap…” He said walking over to the fridge to get himself a beer only to have it knocked out of his hand by Chris.

“I don’t care if you fucking like it or not! You will listen to me! I don’t like him, I don’t want you hanging out with him.”

“Nothing happened!” Joni shouted back, “He is my friend and you are not going to tell me who I can meet! He has a boyfriend and I’m with you. So we danced together, so we like each other’s company?! It doesn’t mean I’d cheat on you with him! It isn’t a crime to dance with someone else!” Joni shouted walking past him. Chris stopped him, taking a hold of his arm, turning him to face him.

“Well he doesn’t look like he cares about his boyfriend that much,” He pointed out, “not the way I care about you!”

Joni looked deep into his eyes,

“Then calm down, I haven’t done anything wrong and I don’t deserve being shouted at.”

“I don’t want you doing that again,” Chris stated more calmly, “I don’t like the way he looks at

 you; I don’t trust him.”

Joni tried to calm down,

“I’m asking you to trust me Chris, you have to trust me when I say that I am not interested in Markus, not in the way you fear.” He touched his cheek, “if you can’t trust me, then how can we work?”

Chris lowered his hand down on his and finally nodded,

“I love you…. but it’s difficult for me to watch when you flirt so much and you do, you did tonight.”

“If it looked that way, I’m sorry… but you also have to calm down your temper, okay, can you do that Chris?”

“I’ll try,” Chris promised and leaned closer to steal his lips in a kiss.

**^^**^^**^^**

Nine months after starting the army Joni was released and his immediate plan was to go to night school to finish his high school and continue modelling while looking into other options, at the same time Chris’ jealousy started to really bother him, what had been cute a year earlier started to take annoying turns….

 

That day Joni had felt bored, having spent enough time studying at home, Chris making long hours at work, he had decided to invite Markus over for coffee. After the unsuccessful evening get-together at Spring, Joni knew well that Chris didn’t like him hanging out with Markus, but wouldn’t let it come in between their friendship. Besides, when Chris wasn’t at home he saw no reason not to invite his friend.

They sat in the kitchen just talking, catching up on things, and laughing at each other’s jokes and as usual there was a certain flirty kind of tone in their conversation but they didn’t really test the lines any further.

“Is Chris still jealous of our friendship?” Markus decided to ask after a while of conversation.

“Yes,” Joni sighed, “and Lauri?”

“Oh yes…. he starts to pout every time he hears your name, I’m getting tired of it.” He admitted.

“I know what you mean; it gets old fast,” Joni nodded and at that exact moment he heard the key turning in the front door and moment later the heavy door opened making Joni glance at the time; only 3pm…

“Hi, I’m home!” Chris called; he had been able to finish earlier and now would have all weekend free. On his way home he had stopped to pick up some wine wanting to spend a relaxing romantic weekend alone with Joni. He placed his shopping on the floor before kicking his shoes off and undressing his coat.

Joni gave Markus a look that almost seemed worried, before he excused himself and walked towards the hall, holding his coffee cup between his hands. “Hi,” He smiled carefully leaning against the wall, “you got home early? Want some coffee?”

Chris smiled back at him, but then, putting his own jacket on the coat rack he noticed one that didn’t belong to either him or Joni.

“Whose jacket is that?” He gritted his teeth glaring at Joni.

Joni glanced towards the jacket, then at Chris,

“It’s Markus’, I invited him for coffee,” Joni explained calmly, “I was bored,”

“Bored? You were bored and you had to bring that son of a bitch?”

Markus who heard Chris raising his voice walked out of the kitchen and towards them.

“Hey calm down man,” He said frowning and glancing at Joni who seemed just as surprised as he was by Chris’ language.

Chris walked towards him grasped his shirt,

“Shut the fuck up! What the fuck were you thinking? What; one ass of your boyfriend is not enough to fuck? You need another one?!”

Joni looked at Chris in disbelieve, okay he had been jealous but this took it to another level.

“Chris, let him go now! He hasn’t done anything; he’s my friend for fucks sake! He just came in to have coffee with me, nothing else!”

“Just coffee?” Chris hissed, “then why behind my back? Why when I’m not home and don’t know about it?” He let go of Markus as if disgusted and then turned to Joni, “ I fucking told you what I think about you and him!”

Joni narrowed his eyes, his lips tightening while looking at him; it was humiliating to be screamed at like this while Markus was there, he didn’t like it one bit.

“What the fuck do you think Chris, am I suppose to call you each fucking time if I want to invite my friends over?”

“Exactly… I have no fucking secrets from you and I expect the same!”

Markus who really started to feel uncomfortable caught in the middle of their fight moved towards the door,

“I should go…” He muttered reaching for his jacket.

“God, you’re being so ridiculous Chris!” Joni snapped, “Can you honestly tell me you would call me every time you want to invite someone over?”

“Of course I fucking would!” Chris shouted, “Unfortunately all my friends are in fucking Canada, because I moved here, FOR YOU!”

Joni hated when Chris pulled out that card, he had to bite his tongue not to say something he would end up regretting, besides he felt embarrassed for his friend,

“Sori Markus, soitan sulle myöhemmin, jooko?” Joni muttered looking at him.

Chris snarled angrily, “That was fucking low!” Markus hurried to take his jacket and shoes before rushing away, “fucking coward!” Chrisshouted at the boy slamming the door behind him.

Joni was sure the whole neighbourhood could hear him.

“What the fuck is the matter with you Chris?! You’re acting like a 5 year old! I’m sick of your overreacting!”

“Oh am I? I don’t like your chats with him,” he turned and glared at Joni,

“Yes, I can see that! But he’s my friend, so you will just have to deal with it.”

“Then change your friend to someone who doesn’t want to fuck you!”

Joni sighed, tired, “You’re really, really overreacting, stop trying to control everything I do! He didn’t fuck me, alright? God try to have some faith in me!” He glared at him for a while before turning back to the kitchen, where he lowered his coffee cup down and turned the machine off.

“Oh, he didn’t? Good,” Chris walked closer to Joni and turned him around, “good, because I don’t want anyone else to fuck you beside me.”

Joni looked at him silently for a moment,

“Next time I have a friend over don’t you dare to start shouting at them the way you just did.” Joni warned.

“And next time you have a friend over, tell me,” Chris requested, leaning closer.

To Joni it sounded idiotic, made him feel like a child,

“What if one of my friends decides to pay me an unexpected visit, am I to call you even then?”

Chris rose his brows,

“Yes, unless it’s a chick,” he nodded.

Joni felt his breathing getting tense, trying to control himself; seriously did other couples have a rule like this? – He doubted.

“What about Dima? What about my other straight friends?” He asked tensely.

“Don’t test me…” Chris hissed.

”I’m sorry but it sounds silly to me, I mean come on Chris!” Joni folded his arms over his chest, leaning against the counter.

“I just don’t like it,” Chris tried to calm down, “look, I care for you and I don’t like when guys are staring at your ass,” he moved closer to his ear, “it’s my ass and only I can fuck it.”

“Possessive, are we?” Joni rolled his eyes then looked at him tried to calm down as well, “of course I care about you as well, I’m with you, aren’t I? Just… You have to trust me!” He looked at him carefully, “you have to learn to control your jealousy, and you can’t go around shouting at people like that,”

“Maybe,” Chris nodded.

“Okay, so no more shouting?” Joni asked, his eyes fixed on his.

“No more shouting,” Chris promised with a whisper.

“Good.” Joni sighed and leaned to kiss his cheek carefully. He was too tired to fight and would rather spend a relaxing weekend with Chris.

Chris smirked and wrapped his arms around his waist and kissed him. Joni answered to the kiss, but still felt slightly taken back by Chris’ jealousy fit.

Chris pushed him more firmly against the counter, deepening the kiss, nibbling at his lower lip while lifting his shirt up.

Joni moaned softly batting in his mind over the fact if he should give in or not after the fight, his hands travelled to Chris’ shirt, gripping the fabric. Chris’ breathing had turned hard, he lifted Joni up to sit on the counter, ripping his shirt open, kissing his shoulder and neck hungrily, biting, sucking, wanting to mark him as his.

Joni tried to pull away,

“Chris; I’ve told you no marks!” He sighed frustrated; they had had this conversation too many times already. His agent was losing patience because he didn’t seem to keep control of his boyfriend’s desire of bruising his skin with love bites; they weren’t easy to cover. 

Chris narrowed his eyes, looking at him, clearly pouting at the matter but he said nothing, just undid his pants and Joni knew he had already managed to make a small one on his neck, he could only hope that there wouldn’t be any more. Sighing he leaned closer to kiss his cheek, hands caressing his shoulders,

“You have no reason to be jealous…” he whispered quietly, making Chris look up to his eyes and lean closer to steal his lips into a kiss.

“I want to fuck you, right here…” Chris whispered into his ear, lifting his hips to get rid of pants and underwear.

“I know,” Joni whispered, “the oil is in the same closet with the flour.” He added.

Chris smirked, “You are mine, remember that,” he whispered turning him around, bending him over the counter.

Joni turned his face towards him, hands resting flatly against the counter; he glanced towards the cabinet where the oil was, and then at Chris who was happily caressing his butt.

“No marks?” He asked, “how about here?” and before Joni could react  Chris was already biting his thigh, making him yelp, feeling his dry finger nudging against his hole slowly trying to make its way in.

“Use the damn oil!” Joni snapped.

Chris felt annoyed, glared at him but then got the bottle, smearing it on Joni’s ass.

“Happy?” He asked pushing two fingers inside harshly, making Joni cry out softly,

“Easier…” He reminded him knowing Chris was in this mood again and it was soon confirmed as the man leaned over his back, licking the nape of his neck, his fingers working inside of him, thrusting in and out and wriggling mercilessly.

It was rather painful, but Joni couldn’t really move when his weight was pinning him down.

“Chris…” he whimpered.

“Yeah?” Chris whispered adding a third finger, tired of handling Joni with kid’s gloves, he stretched him wider, his other hand undoing his own pants and pulling his hard cock out.

“Slower…” Joni asked, “it hurts slightly,” he turned his face to again look at him.

“You’re so fucking girlish sometimes.” Chris whispered, “but I can prep you more if you want.” He pushed a forth finger in, twisting Joni’s arm behind his back, pining him down to prevent him from escaping now.

Joni screamed, by instinct trying to move farther only to have his hipbones press painfully against the edge, tears filling his eyes.

“Not ready yet?” Chris asked turning his fingers and aiming at that spot he knew well by now where to find.

Joni gasped at the sudden feeling of pleasure, making the pain more tolerable, he couldn’t help but moan, not a single sensible word making out.

Chris kept massaging that spot smirking down at him, “You like that don’t you? Being spread wide and fucked hard?”

Joni’s body relaxed slightly, vision getting foggy, panting as the pleasure kept growing, almost making him feel like he could pass out from it. “nnh… Chris…”

“Yes? I’m listening, tell me what you want?” He licked his ear, listened Joni’s pants and moans,

“f-fuck…”

Chris smirked happily and pulled his fingers out, “and you will get just that,” he said before taking a hold of his hips, aiming his cock against his anus and thrusting in to the hilt not even waiting for Joni to adjust; he was already spread so nicely so Chris started rimming into him madly.

Joni close his eyes, groaning, his hips kept hitting painfully against the counter and the rough manner in which he was being fucked started hurting again, softening his erection.

“You’re… fucking mine!” Chris hissed in his ear, “say you’re mine or I’ll fuck you ‘till you bleed.”

Sometimes Chris’ possessiveness scared it him, made him feel uneasy like now.

“I’m yours…”  Joni panted out, at the moment just wanting Chris to finish up fast.

Chris answered with a growl, speeding up, “then fucking… remember that!”

Joni bit his lip, this felt weird, and wrong somehow; Chris had never before been this rough. However he tried to push his hips up to meet with Chris’ thrusts; to make him come faster, he felt quite sore by now and couldn’t help but to whimper beneath him.

“C-chris…” he moaned out, knowing how the man loved when he breathed out his name during sex.

Chris hand let go of Joni’s hip and gripped his hair instead,

“Yeah Joni… you…fucking good,” Chris gave him couple of more firm deep thrusts before burying himself deep within his body, filling him up with his seed.

Joni tried to collect his breathing, he felt exhausted, Chris let go of his hair and arm and withdrew from him, “Wonderful,” he whispered in Joni’s ear and kissed his neck, “Joni, you came?”

Joni almost laughed bitterly to the question but held himself down, he wasn’t sure what to think now,

“No,” He finally replied, pulling himself up, “It’s okay… I think I’ll just take a shower and get some rest.”

“No,” Chris said turning him around and grasped his organ stroking it gently, “I want you to come…”

Joni tried to take a more comfortable position, feeling his insides still throbbing as if Chris’ length was still be buried in him. He moaned softly when Chris’ touch started to feel good.

“Good boy,” Chris grinned, kneeling between his spread legs, taking him into his mouth, sucking gently while his hand slowly massaged his balls.

Joni closed his eyes, the one hand taking support on the counter, while the other went to Chris’ hair, he could feel it as the oil and Chris’ sperm started to leak from his opening, he bit his lips,

“going to make a mess…” He whispered,

“I like it,” Chris smirked licking his cock, looking up to his face, teasing his finger around the leaking hole, “when my cum is leaking from inside your cute little ass, it almost makes me hard again…”

“Well… just to let you know… won’t be going in there again today… too sore,” Joni grinned eyes closing, focusing on the feeling of Chris’ lips around his member.

Chris merely grinned around his cock; if he wanted he knew how to push Joni into the right direction, knew just what strings to pull, sore ass or not…

Chris really knew how to do this, the warmth of his mouth around him felt maddening, pleasure growing intense, Joni started thrusting his hips forward, Chris’ mouth, for a moment able to forget the pain.

“Nhh… close…” He warned and Chris only started sucking him harder and pretty soon he felt Joni’s cum fill his mouth, the lean body trembling before him, Joni cursing quietly in pleasure. Chris swallowed everything he could, licking his lips and looking up with a smirk.

“Wasn’t that bad, was it dear?” He asked getting up and kissing him on the lips. Joni looked at him carefully.

“Next time; be more gentle, okay?” He asked,

“Of course, I promise,” Chris smiled and kissed him again. ”Let’s go and shower, then I’ll make some dinner, you can rest.”

Joni nodded carefully, sometimes Chris confused him, his rough and gentle side mixing, changing so suddenly, however he gave him a small smile back,

“Thank you,” he whispered. “I don’t want to see another jealousy fit like that again, Chris.” He decided to add to which Chris only smiled,

“And you won’t dear, not if you don’t give me another reason for it…” he whispered and gently kissed the tip of his nose.


         Web published: February 13th, 2009.

            My Secret Shore

© KOLGRIM

Foolish Games 19

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